Jerry Jones, bombastic owner of the Dallas Cowboys, says there is no link between CTE and professional football.  He says this because doctors and medical researchers are stupid.  Really dumb.  I think it is amazing that doctors can find their keys in the morning.  And they let these people operate?  Scary.  They might be book smart, but when it comes to common sense, well….

Speaking of book smart, I detest the phrase “book smart.”  Every time I hear somebody use it I want to punch them in the liver (I could start with Jerry Jones).  And throw Picante sauce in their face.  In reality, my liver punching is completely impractical.  I would be punching people all day long.

One thing I do notice is that people who throw around the phrase “book smart” often aren’t.  But it doesn’t bother them.  They may not be able to understand computers, but they sure as hell can fix a toilet.  Not that I am complaining.  The world needs working toilets.  I think we can all agree on that.

Anyway, the problem with the phrase “book smart” is that it bears no resemblance to logic.  While I know that logic isn’t in regular use nowadays, I ask the reader to bear with me a moment.  The notion is that while a climatologist may be able to understand high level statistics, they are unable to accomplish even the most mundane tasks and thus their conclusions about climate change are suspect.

Let me dispel this myth now.  Though there are some exceptions, nearly every scientist is perfectly capable of understanding how a furnace works (for example).  Furnaces aren’t complex.  That is why you can go to technical college to learn to fix them.  If a guy with a Ph.D spent two months studying furnaces, he would know more about furnaces than you do.  Not only that, he would actually understand the science behind its operation.  And he wouldn’t have to come back three times with that dumb look on his face.  Also, lose some weight.  Jesus.

But a lot of smart people don’t learn to repair furnaces.  They don’t have to.  Because anybody can do it.  I know guys who can repair carburetors who read at a fifth grade level.  If I need a carburetor repaired, I’ll listen to what they have to say.  Otherwise, they can pretty much keep their opinions to themselves.  Because they are wrong.  Why?  Because they can’t learn anything from books.  And that is where most of the world’s information resides (or on the Internet- which was created by “Book Smart” people you know).

In conclusion, being “book smart” isn’t a bad thing.  In fact, all of the technology that makes your life easier was created by “book smart” people.  The Book Smart brings you your music, your tv, your IPad, your Kim and Kanye updates.  The Book Smart are your gods.  Without them, you would be wallowing in the dirt and using your common sense medical knowledge to try and combat the plague.  (Here’s a clue to get you started.  You don’t have the plague because your neighbor’s wife is a witch.)  Without the Book Smart, you would all be dead or at the very least be covered in lesions.  You would also have few if any teeth (ok maybe that is a bad example).

Anyway, the Book Smart are your masters.  Bow to your masters!  All hail the Book Smart!!! They are the wellspring from which you flow.  Without them, you would cease to exist.  They are your god.

Important Disclaimer:  If Trump wins, I want everyone to know that my account was hacked by some elitist, blaspheming egghead.  Who probably can’t even fix his own lawnmower.

And if the climate is warming, how come we got a foot of snow last night?  It is March 24 for crying out loud.  Those scientists can’t explain everything.  It’s just their Liberal Agenda talking.

One of them probably is the hacker.  They know all about that computer stuff.